Introducing Reynauldo and Ormond, who are based simultaneously on the initial heroes in Darkest Dungeon and, of course, Shovel Knight.
DM: Tucked under mountains that throw long shadows and cast cold winters…..the town has waited restlessly for you at the end of the path. You arrive to find–
Reynauldo: (Aloof) A normal dung-covered low-level town.
DM: Ok then.
Reynauldo: Story’s gonna start in the tavern. Let’s move.
Ormond: But what if it doesn’t?
Raynauldo: (Confused) Eh?
Ornmond: What if the DM built us this whole town to explore? (Paula Al Dean walks behind him, looking confused.) Going straight to the the tavern would squander all of her hard work! What if she gave each person here a meticulous backstory? What if the quest is not in the baubles, but in knowing their lifestuff? We’ll never know what we missed! (Ormond dramatically points at Paula.) YOU THERE! Random passerby! What is your name and trade!?
DM: um. uhh.
Paula: (Awkwardly) Paula…..Paula Al Dean?
DM: Suddenly, violent clouds whirl above the helpless town, and then….
(Lightning vaporizes Paula.)
DM: The very rage of God. Tragic.
Ormond: (Holding the burned corpse of Paula,) We have to help–
Reynauldo: (Pointing away and starting to run,) Nope! TAVERN HO!